翻译求助

STcoco

一整段，都不知道怎么翻译才好，只好救助来了。：
It's too much. Harry knows,intellectually, that the anger blazing through him, testing his self-control, is actually misdirected guilt. But Snape has always had a gift for scraping Harry's nerves, his patience, his emotions raw, and he can feel his self-control slipping like a hot knife through butter. "Oh, I don't know, Snape. How about, 'What a stroke of luck that you needed only a death wish and a massive martyr complex to defeat the Dark Lord, Potter! If the survival of the wizarding world had depended on your intellect, on careful application of reason, forethought, and discretion, we would most certainly have died horrible deaths! You've put us all in danger with your recklessness. I hope you're happy.' Does that sum things up? Did I miss anything?"
现在的翻译如下：

　　够了。哈利的神智很清楚地知道自己是迁怒于人，但已怒火中烧，无法自制。斯内普总有种天赋，能激怒哈利，耗尽他的耐心，挑动他的情绪，他眼睁睁地看着他的自控如一把灸热的小刀切过黄油：“我不知道，斯内普。‘下个遗嘱，加上慷慨激昂英勇就义精神，你就能打败黑魔王了，波特，你真是无与伦比的幸运！要是巫师世界的现存人口得依靠着你的智力、分析能力、深谋远虑还有守口如瓶，我们一定已经早就死得无比难看了！你的莽撞把我们置于危险之地。真是祝你快乐。'这样够不够？还少不少什么？”

kyanite1515

楼上的那位翻译的很有感觉不够我觉得那句What a stroke of luck that you needed only a death wish and a massive martyr complex to defeat the Dark Lord, Potter!
翻译的倒是没有体现出英文的那个讽刺的感觉，也许变换一下语序会是个不错的选择？
多么好运啊，仅仅靠着求死的愿望和巨大的牺牲精神的结合就可以打败黑魔王，Potter！

wsbc001

要是我翻我大概会翻成这样:

太过份了。理智层面上，哈利知道此刻在他体内灼烧、考验着他的自控能力的怒火，其实是被误导的负罪感。但斯内普一直有种天赋，能够把他的神经、耐心和情感磨到失控边缘。哈利能感觉到他的自我控制就像切黄油的热刀一样迅速下滑。“噢，我不知道，斯内普。这样怎么样：‘要打败黑魔王竟然只需要结合求死的意愿和巨大的牺牲精神，你运气真是好得出奇，波特！要是巫师界的的存亡依靠的是你的智力，依靠的是合情合理、深思熟虑和谨慎判断，我们肯定早就死无葬身之地了！你的莽撞让我们大家都陷入了险境。现在你高兴了？’这样总结行不行？我有没有漏了什么没说？”


呃，ST乃知道我的水平不怎么样，所以你就凑合看看，我不帮倒忙就不错了OTL

wuya城

神智很清楚的不如翻译成“理智上”？
the anger blazing through him, testing his self-control, is actually misdirected guilt.
其实就我个人理解，这句直翻就很好，大概是说“那蔓延周身的怒火实际上是一种偏离的罪，反复地考验着他的自控能力”，偏离也许不大对劲，不过guilt？没看过原文，不知道具体讲啥来着。但大概就如此吧XDDD。当然LZ那种翻译也不错
emotions raw的raw我觉得翻成“脆弱的”的比较好
a death wish 更倾向于“求死”，是说这种意愿来着？
当然，只是一点建议……sm2001
LZ加油翻译~

典苍

呃，我就帮一句吧。别的咱也没啥好建议。
I hope you're happy. 这个我觉得可以翻译成：你现在高兴了?